Review: Veronica (2017)

SYNOPSIS: Madrid, 1991. A teen girl finds herself besieged by an evil supernatural force after she played Ouija with two classmates. – via IMDB

Ag pffffff. This movie. Why?! I got my hopes up, what with reading a lot of positive feedback and having it compared favourably to The Conjuring (even though that has no rewatch value, it’s really good the first time around). I was so ready for a horror that was going to be good, and I thought this might be it, being a Spanish horror and all.

Well. This is certainly not it. I don’t know, it pretty much irritated me from the off. I wasn’t a fan of the cast, the kids running all over the show the whole time annoyed me, the mother and her terrible parenting skills also only served to piss me off (for reals, it is not the teenage daughter’s job to keep the kids fed and clean and in school). It’s neglect, I don’t care what is said about it. Then there is our titular Veronica herself, and she was just so… dull.

Forgetting about the meh characters all round, I found that the story had no bite, and was pretty damn generic. Nothing fancy, nothing special, nothing we haven’t seen before, and certainly nothing that will stay with you after all is said and done. The best character was Sister Death, and she’s barely in it. The story could have been generic but solid. I suppose it is for others, but it did not work for me – it lacked tension and focus and the execution came across as sloppy.

Veronica is also long. Far longer than it necessarily needed to be. It almost put me to sleep at times what with the drag throughout it. Nothing made me go wow. Nothing. The score itself wasn’t too bad, I thought it a bit quirky but I liked it, so there is that.

Okay, I will stop now. I found Veronica to be a super disappointing, bland, lifeless experience. It was peppered with clichés and suffered from horrible pacing and too much screaming and a major lack of an engaging story. I didn’t find it to be atmospheric, either. It just was… there. Oh well. I would skip this, you won’t really be missing that a million other supernatural horrors haven’t done before.

Review: The Girl On The Train (2016)

“My husband used to tell me I have an overactive imagination. I can’t help it. I mean, haven’t you ever been on a train and wondered about the lives of the people who live near the tracks? The lives you’ve never lived.”
– Rachel Watson

SYNOPSIS: A divorcee becomes entangled in a missing persons investigation that promises to send shockwaves throughout her life. – via IMDB

As some of you may recall, I recently read the book and I was totally not a fan. At all. I decided to watch the movie just because I wanted to see if it could convey better to screen, because surely there would be a better way to tell the story than the way it was presented in that absolutely godawful book. Well… right and wrong.

The way the movie was presented and the story told was better than the book. It wasn’t the same frustrating back and forth jumping in time, leaving you lost and confused. You get the story told from the perspective and times of three different women, but it is so much easier to follow. So much of the excess crap and internal monologues of the book are cut away here, so things definitely flow better. That being said, that is probably the only good stuff to note from this disappointing outing.

I couldn’t stand any of the characters. Again. No shocker, I expected this, but still. I really didn’t want to compare this to Gone Girl, especially with all the comparisons that exist, but now I can see it. While reading the book, I didn’t necessarily see the parallels too much (make no mistake, they are there at times), but this movie just felt like a cheap, sad knockoff. Tate Taylor definitely tried to pull a David Fincher with a washed out palette, a dark story, and a solid cast. Instead of any of that working, it falls apart here, and the cast just fails to make the boring material any more acceptable. Their performances just feel hollow. The story is not smart and unpredictable and twisty – its just bland and average.

I also found that the movie pushed to put a lot of sex in this, but it comes across as really unsexy, not the dark, forbidden, screwed up sex it tries to be. It fails miserably there. Also, how do you manage that with Luke Evans on screen? Unacceptable. I was not engaged once throughout the course of this movie, and I was frustrated watching it because I was bored beyond belief. I thought we were nearing the end (and how sad is that, considering I have actually read the book) and say that we were only a hour and five minutes in. What the heck?

The Girl On The Train features deplorable characters, a dull story, absolutely zero tension and atmosphere, and will leave you feeling disappointed and robbed of your precious time. It’s an absolute snooze fest, one I would highly recommend you skip and stay away from.

Review: Now That She’s Gone – Gregg Olsen

now that she's gone

Waterman and Stark #2

I received this book in exchange for an honest review.

SYNOPSIS: Notorious serial killer Brenda Nevins has cajoled, seduced, blackmailed, and left a trail of bodies all across Washington State. Now, after a daring prison escape, she is free to carry out her ultimate act of revenge. The targets: forensic pathologist Birdy Waterman and sheriff’s detective Kendall Stark. The pawn: a television psychic hungry for fame, ratings, and blood. There’s only way to stop a killer as brutal, brilliant, and twisted as this: beat her at her own game… via Goodreads

GRADE 3.5I wish I had known this was a sequel, it would have explained so much. Things make more sense that I know now. Not that it changes the fact that this was a real chore to read. No, sirree, nothing will change that. I had big problems with the fact that this book comprised of some of the flattest, most boring, one dimensional characters I have ever had the misfortune of reading about. Not only are they bland and boring, they are uneven. There are few things that annoy me as much as character inconsistencies, and Olsen’s characters are riddled with them, which is just unacceptable. I got this book to read about the promised serial killer. Come on, that psyche is something that has always fascinated me. A female one? We get so little of that, so much potential. Nope, not what I got. I got a plain, silly Brenda Nevins with her fake boobs and immensely lacking character. She was lame, she did not scare me or fascinate me at all, which was a real pity. I so wanted more. I felt not one ounce of fear or urgency at any single part of this book. When I come to read a crime thriller, I expect those aspects to be present, and I was sorely disappointed to not have them feature here. I feel that there was no backstory for anything that happened in this novel, though I am unsure as to whether or not that is because I missed the last one. Indeed, if that is the reason, Olsen should have given us enough material to move us along in this one and not leave the reader feeling bewildered and confused within the first two chapters. I found that there were absolutely no characters that I liked or wanted to back and support at all, which is not really what you want from a story. I also found the plot lines to be exceptionally forced. I know this review is harsh, and it really is not what I envisioned, and not what I wanted to write, but the book really just did nothing for me, and then just ended, leaving me hanging with nothing wrapping up, and I cannot stand that in a book. I cannot recommend this book, especially not to those who enjoy thrillers, and expect a page turner, gore, a serious story, and an antagonist and protagonist that will draw you in.