Review: The Craft (1996)

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“True magic is neither black, nor white – it’s both because nature is both. Loving and cruel, all at the same time. The only good or bad is in the heart of the witch. Life keeps a balance on its own.”
– Lirio

SYNOPSIS: Four girls at a Los Angeles Catholic school form a coven of witches that cast spells on their classmates and each other. Their new powers overwhelm them, leading to an internal power struggle. – via IMDB

the-craft-spells

I watched this movie so many times as a kid. So many damn times. I liked the fact that these girls were different (not to mention witches) and not afraid to embrace that. That’s always something I enjoy, when women do not conform to the expectations of society. The Craft is a good film. It starts out all innocent and sweet, and then devolves into utter madness.

I thought the actresses picked to play the witches were all great, and all brought something else to the table. These are just young girls with small things that irk them, that come together because they are different, they believe they are powerful. Initially they ask for little things, each having their own small issues. This is where some big lessons come in. They say you can’t always get what you want, and be careful what you wish for. You hear it all the time. This movie shows how seemingly innocent things can be turned on their heads.

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The constantly shifting dynamics between the girls is also something that is fascinating. Innocent, then friends, then obsessed and changing, afraid of Nancy, yet power hungry and feeling superior to the rest. Then there is Sarah, a witch and girl questioning her group, not wanting to conform to the inevitable peer pressure. That does not stop the magic the girls try out from just getting bigger and more crazy, and does not change the fact that these girls can be right bitches.

Seeing how the magic doesn’t quite work as one would hope, and how it can sour terribly was interesting. It takes a different spin on it than a lot of movies handling magic and witches usually do.
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JB & The Chop Do: Scream 4 (2011)

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JB & THE CHOP SCREAM

After taking such a long hiatus – and relieving the public of my constant shame – I want to say that I have had a shitload of fun doing this again, JB. Thanks for not giving up on me :  ) I haven’t exactly loved these Scream movies BUT I didn’t grow up on them like you did. I wonder what we can pick next… maybe something older – like ME! I remember the 90s as my young 20s when I moved out of my mom’s and went to college and had to start paying bills and shit and working 90 hours a week (for real). Those aren’t my fondest memories CRY CRY CRY. But, with that, I had to say this was probably my favorite one of the bunch… *walks slowly backwards out of the room….

scream 4 poster

SYNOPSIS: Ten years have passed, and Sidney Prescott, who has put herself back together thanks in part to her writing, is visited by the Ghostface Killer. – via IMDB

CHOP SCREAM

What made me like it the most out of the four? It came out in 2011 so it was a little more modern. It was definitely much  more gory,  #guts . Dewey seems to be back to his role as an inept #dingdong . I know the cast is principally the same but I liked the cameos. This came out right when True Blood was popular so I wonder how much they had to pay Anna Paquin and her #legs to be in this for two minutes? I also liked the fact that the killer made sense this time even though I still think the costume is not #tits . If you don’t get that reference, you can search my site for the three page explanation of how that term came into my life. Searching that word on my site will take you to probably 1000 of the 1300+ posts out there. Go find it and get back to me here. Maybe you’ll win a prize! A #booby prize!

Plus – Marley Shelton??? #??????????? any movie with her in it gets extra marks from me.

I also like Emma Roberts. I don’t think JB does but I do – I really liked her in Scream Queens.

You know what I didn’t like? This asshole’s hairdo. (Not the chick). A man’s hair should never blow in the wind! #fuckinhippies

I also really liked the publicist:

Where have I seen her before??? OH YEAH! She’s one of the leads from GLOW!

I loved that show! Bring on season two! More #spandex and #chickfights and #cleavage and #bighair and #showerscenes . #hashtag

I always try and end these runs with a nice thank you to the beloved JB, not that that happens consistently but… even though JB and I live on different continents, if it ever came down to it, and I was a zombie:

It gives It permission to end It without repercussions. It does not want It to end It in any way, but It saw this image and it made It think of It.

Always love,

It

JB SCREAM

And here we are, the final movie. Thank you all for sticking with us, reading, commenting, everything. As always, we appreciate it! It’s been a blast, and hopefully we will be back soon with something new!

I think that this is a damn fine entry to the series, especially after so many years passing in between. More solid than the last, that is for sure, and I really liked how it took the concept of Scream and modernised it to cellphones, vlogging, etc. So much has changed! I will always be a fan of the fact that the same cast has always returned for their roles, it just gives the whole experience a more cohesive and authentic feeling, which is awesome. I really like how these movies are all solid – truly, how many franchises can say that they have so many entries and that they are all well worth watching? *cough* Amityville *cough*

scream 4 don't fuck with the original

Thank goodness Cox’s hair was sorted out – Scream 3 did her no wonders whatsoever, and whoever styled her hair with that fringe should have been shot. Seriously. Her and Dewey being together is adorable, and I will not lie, that blonde woman, Hicks, who was hitting on Dewey? Really made me angry :/ Stay away or go find an available man, hooker! Even though the Chop thinks she is hot. Which is fine. But she must back off the Gale/Dewey thing!

And yes, the Chop is 100% right – I am still not sold on Emma Roberts. Even her face just looks like a spoiled brat to me, and she always comes across like that, too. Ugh. She isn’t even that great an actress (or I have yet to see her in anything where she wows me, at any rate).

Scream 4 brings on the slashing, the guts, the gore, some humour, more movie references than you can shake a stick at and all most all of our favourite characters. *cough cough* no Randy ;( The rules have been updated, too, for a more modern set, and it works for this. When this first came I just didn’t watch it, because… well… what if it didn’t end well? When I finally got to it I was pleasantly surprised, and definitely rank this over Scream 3.

scream 4 i'm gay rule

I almost died when they tried to call Rory Culkin’s Charlie Walker this generation’s Billy Loomis. Are you freaking kidding me?????? Are you?????? I mean I get the updating and all of that but… but… yeah. Still not, though I did like how he was worked with in this.

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Hayden Panettiere (who I am sure will always be Claire, the cheerleader, for me) initially struck me as potentially out of place in this, but fast becomes a fan favourite, she’s awesome.

scream 4 trying to do ghostface

Anyway, after all is said and done, I just want to thank Eric from the bottom of my heart for doing these movies with me! I am glad to see you liked them, even if you didn’t love them! I am so excited for any and all future projects that we will do together (and damn, those Amityville movies are racking up again). This is always fun and you rock 😀

PS: It loves Its picture, but It will not be ending It in a hurry!

JB & The Chop Do: Scream 3 (2000)

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JB & THE CHOP SCREAM

Peeps! We are totally on a roll with these movies, the most awesome Chop and I! Man, I have been having a blast, and I am thrilled the Chop was game to do another one of these. So now we are on to the third part of the original trilogy. This is, in my opinion, the weakest of the four Scream films… but what did PSC think of this thing?

scream 3 poster

SYNOPSIS: While “Stab 3” is in production, somebody in a ghost mask starts to murder the new cast members. This lures Sidney out from hiding deep in the woods where she lives, and she comes to Hollywood to face the killer for the final act. – via IMDB

JB SCREAM

So let me immediately start out by saying that Courtney Cox’s hairdresser completely screwed up her hair. Gale is this hot, tenacious reporter with very few qualms. Then she’s back here, and she is all those things but that fringe. Plus her wardrobe. Okay, there was just a lot appearance-wise that was just not working for her in this. Goodness. It was like a horror movie all on its own!

This one certainly lacked the charm of the previous two. I appreciated what was being done here, though I was not a big fan of everything being “the movies” and “on set”. It was gimmicky and didn’t work for very long. Scream 3 is certainly the flimsiest of the lot – the story is absolutely ridiculous, but what saves this is the consistency – seriously, the story, the actors reprising their roles, the humour, Sidney still wearing Derek’s necklace, it all works so well in keeping this movie afloat more so than it would otherwise have worked.

Randy Meeks got a little cameo, which was cool.

Neve Campbell truly is fantastic as Sidney, and she is one of my all time favourite horror movie heroines. She just won’t make anything easy for anyone and stands her ground. She is afraid, but she is also sick and tired of all the bullshit. Much love man, much love.

scream 3 it's your turn to scream

The “romance” of the phone calls has been lost, there are calls, but more often than not, like the last, it is more about slashing and killing than anything else. Scream 3 totally delivers on the gore and all, but yeah, there was just something missing.

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Totally stoked to see Gale and Dewey back at it again – this is a romance I will always love. It is just so silly and it works.

Parker Posey irritates the ever-loving crap out of me always, and this movie was no exception. Aside from the silly story, I think she is the main culprit as to why this movie is not a little higher in my esteem, though I still enjoy it. She is grating, annoying, loud, ridiculous, and just all round grating. I don’t ever find her to be an asset or a selling point in a cast.

scream 3 i'm the killer

Anyway, Scream 3 is still fun, though definitely a decline after the other two, but miles ahead of most horror/shasher sequels. The reasoning and explanations get pretty fucking thin (har har) here, but it still entertains nonetheless, and the consistency of these movies elevates it. Much fun.

CHOP SCREAM

Scream 3! The last one! Bangs! Like I’ve said before, I’m not really familiar with these things, but I did find myself laughing a few times in this. Was this supposed to be more of a horror comedy? Or was this supposed to be a horror and the new writer through in some laughs? I know all three of these have aimed to poke fun at themselves for being a horror movie, sequel, etc but this one was kind of funny. Mostly with these two:

I’ve NEVER been a fan of Parker Posey but for some reason I liked her in this. She’s kind of…. dumb but hangs in there. When her and Bangs start screaming and running around with their arms flailing in the air, I liked it. LOL They also had some of the better lines. I liked it when Cox was tied up, off screen and she yells, “SHOOT THE FUCKER!”

I also see Jenny McCarthy’s in here. Obviously for her very good acting skills.

Plus, she really just screams purple!

The keen eye will also notice Emily Mortimer’s décolletage – look at me using fancy words!

I remember when this guy was popular as a kid – before JB was even born. Then he was popular again on that TV show which I never understood. My bad, I guess. Nice hair, bro.

So someone else has a hood and a mask and a knife and a voice altering device. He or she is going around stabbing people and throwing them through glass doors. While this one was bloodier and décolletage-ier, I thought this was pretty flimsy. Like – there’s this one scene where Campbell is running away from the ghost face guy and she opens this door on a movie set and almost falls to her death but then, when she pushes ghosty out the door he falls onto a bed that wasn’t there three seconds before.

Or, during the big climax-explain-why-hes-doing-all-of-this scene, he’s talking to her for several minutes in the killer voice but he’s not even holding the voice modulator to his mouth… because he can’t…. because he’s wearing a fucking mask! Plus, the whole reasons why this person decided to mass murder all of these people in cold blood was kind of stupid. It was kind of the cinematic rendering of this:

Meanwhile, not only were there Creed posters on the wall of the movie-set’s house, there were Creed songs played over the credits. So, speaking of asses:

Anthony Scott Stapp. Get it?? A.S.S. Get it???? HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAH I fucking crack myself up. I’ve already watched number 4 by now so I can say – YUM

JB & The Chop Do: Scream 2 (1997)

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JB & THE CHOP SCREAM

“A year after running over a fisherman and dumping his body in the water, four friends reconvene when Julie receives a frightening letter telling her that their crime was seen. While pursuing who he thinks is responsible for the letter, Barry is run over by a man with a meat hook. The bloodletting only increases from there, as the killer with the hook continues to stalk Julie, Helen and Ray.”

Oh wait…. WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WATCH????

scream 2 poster

SYNOPSIS: Two years after the first series of murders, a new psychopath dons the Ghostface costume and a new string of killings begins. – via IMDB

CHOP SCREAM

For The Good Reader / Zutsonian with a keen eye (it seems paying attention these days is something a lot of people aren’t fond of) the team-up for the first Scream we put out was drafted over two years ago. Since then, I have spent over a year in a foreign land, living in a hotel and eating shit food until a few months ago when things started calming down and I was able to get a laptop back in action. Note: I am NOT fucking patient or OCD free enough to try and do posts on a tablet or phone. Anyway, since time is still precious, my entry here will probably be written in two parts before it goes live, so here’s Part One.

“A guy can’t even take a fucking piss….” that’s actually a quote from Angel Heart (maybe not [sic]) and it may or may not apply here but, I thought it was laughable that these two fellows were off pissing in their ROBES and MASKS setting up the first kill.

  1. As a male, normally, you have to be able to handle the thing that releases the pee – which is why the Benevolent Creator (as it is, whatever you believe in) allowed humans to invent the slit in the front of the pants or, at least, a tie string so we can drop them and let go #zippers
  2. The male human has to be able to see the thing that releases the pee in order to aim or else you fucking piss all over the floor and, likely, your fucking feet. Despite the fact that these people can somehow see through the ‘ghostface’ masks and run around all over the place, they probably really can’t and just befouled the floor and their shoes
  3.  True story that no one will get: about 25 years ago I was at a St Patrick’s Day event at a local bar and went to piss. If you’re not familiar with urinals, you should educate yourself but I was having a good, solid, beer infused whizz, looked over and a popular sports celebrity was peeing next to me. I smiled, stabilized my drunken self, and I noticed was peeing all over his leg. #fuckingclassy #calegundy

Watching this, It’s not so fucking 90s as I remember the first one being but it’s weird seeing a bunch of these folks so young and skinny. I’m a huge fan of Ray Donovan (Liev Schreiber), Timothy Olyphant (you name it), Portia de Rossi (married to Ellen DeGeneres) (or was, that could have changed since I paid attention) but what I thought was the most funny thing, Rebecca Gayheart… I remember when I was a kid, having the hots for her in her OxyClean or Noxzema face cleaning ointment commercials. That picture, while digital, is probably older than JB.

Up next: Part 2:

Speaking of Timothy Olyphant, I see he’s wearing some sort of shirt and has a visible sleeveless undershirt on underneath it. I’ve never understood this. My lifelong understanding of wearing an undershirt was to prevent your armpit sweat from showing or staining your good shirt you have on to impress people. What’s the fucking point of not covering your armpits? Why wear two sets of shirts for no reason. I guess, if these things aren’t popular overseas, here’s what I’m talking about:

Jeez, nice thighs, man. The movie? I think I liked it more than the first. I liked the new cast better and it was “less 90s”. Plus there was some Foo Fighters in there. You can’t go wrong with a little Foo. It was basically the same story as the first, with more blood – which is something they talk about early on in “Film Study”. Now let’s pass the mic over to JB. Oh, since I know JB loves GIFs, I better include one.

JB SCREAM

Sequels aren’t usually that good, we all know that. It is a topic that this sequel harps on about, and it is  actually successful. For one, I still had an absolute blast with this movie, how conscious it is of the type of film it is, how it mocks and taunts again, even after having done all those things. Scream 2 manages to pull it off. Hell, it even has a (really) brief glimpse of Joshua Jackson in it, so there aren’t complaints for me – except maybe that it could have been more Joshua Jackson????? I need eye candy too!

Screw it, I will provide my own… just the one, I swear…

Anyway, let’s get to the movie. Super big fan of having Dewey back, and watching him argue and snipe at Gale is adorable. Seriously, I absolutely love watching these two together. It is sweet and it is seriously funny, too! David Arquette and Courtney Cox have fantastic chemistry. Sidney Prescott is back and kicking some major ass again, not to mention Gale laying down the law, too. There are a lot of throwbacks to the first movie here, but it all works. Scream 2 knows what it is and apologetically rolls with it.

Now, on to… *drum roll*

THE UNFORGIVABLE DEATH OF RANDY MEEKS

This! Fuck! Why?! This still rankles. I get why it would happen (do I really???). Doesn’t mean I gotta like it. And I don’t. I hatessssss it!

In Randy’s words, “Fuuuuuuuuuck yoooooou.”

scream 2 randy

Gale develops quite a bit more in this one, which is good. She’s still a bitch, but Gale is fantastic. Cotton Weary plays a bigger role in this one, but I still don’t like the damn creep. Icky, icky, icky.

We get tons of blood, tons of fun, tons of chases and tension and games, and plenty to quote. I thoroughly enjoy the humour in Scream, it just gels with me. In short, Scream 2 delivers everything you could want from a sequel.

Okay, this is the last one. I swear.

JB & The Chop Do: Scream (1996)

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JB & THE CHOP SCREAM

What the what?! Yes, you are seeing this correctly! The Chop and I return! We are back in business peeps! After all this time! This time we are back to see what we make of Craven’s slasher franchise. So gear up, get ready, and let it be like old times with our latest crazy collaboration!

scream movie poster

SYNOPSIS: A group of teens are pitted against a masked murderer that tests their knowledge of horror movies. – via IMDB

JB SCREAM

What? A Scream collaboration with the Chop? YES! Dreams! You all know I have crazy love for this. Like, it is madness. My husband laughs at me, he thinks I have lost my mind, but he lets me get into it every time. It is one of my favourite things to watch, and something that gets my attention multiple times a year. I even recently got myself a Scream themed backpack, and I fucking love it!

I grew up watching the Scream movies, and as I have gotten older, I have seen there is even more to appreciate than I ever really realised as a kid – so they are both sentimental and smart for me, so winning! Scream is a stroke of genius. Why? Because it mocks on horror movies, does its thing, conforms (and yet stays original and fresh) and teases and jokes.

scream 1 bad movies

Scream also heralds one of the most memorable opening scenes ever. Wow. It stays with you and is handled so damn well, hooking you in the opening minutes. Barrymore was perfect as Casey, introducing the creepy call, and her death totally sets the bloody style for the movies right off the bat. So good!

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Let’s not pretend Scream isn’t nineties as fuck, but you know what? It works for it. This movie just owns everything. I have serious feelings of nostalgia when it comes to these movies, and I know there are others out there. Love, love, love this, as you can all surely tell 😀

Then there is Sidney Prescott. For reals, this girl is a freaking awesome Final Girl. She doesn’t take flak, she puts up a fight, and she really goes for it. Sassy, smart, survival.

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Speaking of specific characters, we cannot forget fan favourites Deputy Dewey and Randy. Man, Dewey you cannot help but adore, and Arquette is brilliant. Then, of course, there is Randy, the signature film geek you gotta love man. I enjoyed his references.

scraem randy meeks bullshit reason

Scream has fun extolling the rules of the horror/slasher genre, and balances this so well with the movie. We get a fun movie, not something to be taken too seriously, but that still brings the gore, the tension, and the blood to the table. What more could you ask for?!

scream rules

Also, gotta say, while he is not everyone’s cup of tea (and he isn’t even my cup of tea), Skeet Ulrich is doing the most messed up stuff here, but looks damn fine while doing it (I am specifically looking at all at the end – yes, I know how psycho that sounds).

billy loomis scream corn syrupbill scream knife hot

Anyway, I say again, I fucking love Scream. I am going to stop here because I have reviewed these and discussed these all over the show, so I am going to leave it at these movies are awesome. I am looking forward to covering all of this with my partner in collaboration crime Eric. Much fun ahead. Now that you all know what I have to say about it, what did the Chop think?!

CHOP SCREAM

1st off – I would like to say THANK YOU to our JB for agreeing to do another series with me. I was afraid I scared her clean off after the Amityville run. When she came back around and asked if I wanted to do the Scream series, I was all “sure thing – I think I’ve only seen one of them” and now – WE’RE BACK!!!!!

Here’s my history with Scream: I really do remember when this came out and I really do remember that this was featured in the commercials here, where I live:

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Obviously, I was intrigued but in 1996 I was going through a divorce and living in this shit-cheap apartment that was built back in the 1930s that really did have a BOILER in the corner for heat. That winter was VERY hard and cold and I basically had to sleep on the floor by the thing to try and stay warm at night. Anyway – one night, my friend and I went downtown to this bar and this band called Jackyl was playing behind it so we went out to drink beer and watch the show.  I’ve never been a really upfront/alpha kind of guy with the ladies – I’ve always let them seek me out – but, for some reason I started lurking lingering around this chick and let her sit on my shoulders to see the band and she ended up following me (us) home.

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As things turned out, she had a bootleg copy of this movie on VHS so we popped it in and got under the blanket and started watching it and then *ahem* #romance happened and we never finished it. I also didn’t want to be in a relationship again so I never called her even though that was some of the best #romance I ever had. Several years later I was living with my girlfriend at the time who was totally cheating on me and one night we started watching Scream 3 and got most of the way through it before #romance happened so I’ve never really seen one of these all the way through.

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Until now, but unfortunately there hasn’t been any #romance as a result of it although earlier I went and got my copy of True Detective back from my coworker since I’m leaving this place and I’ll never see her again and she said she’d be happy to be in my movie I’m working on and she’s willing to show her boobs if need be, so there’s that. Actually, I guess by the time this posts I’ll no longer be employed here so, hi Future Eric – remember to text XXXXXXXXXXX.

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As for Scream – I thought it was good enough. I know I’m the old man of the group, so I didn’t grow up with these like JB and others did so it didn’t resonate with me in all of it’s 90s-ness like it will most people. I thought the “ghostface” costume was dumb and NOT scary and the wardrobes were awful – I half expected the cast to have their acid washed Guess? jeans cuffs pinched and rolled up over their ankles while they smoked Marlboro Light Shorts out of a box. They used to call that the French Rolled or Penny Rolling look around here and it was AWFUL but it looks like rolled up cuffs are making a comeback in Europe and they’re calling it “Pinrolling”. Shit.

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Regarding the movie in general, I thought the cast did a good job and it was a lot bloodier than I thought it would be but I got kind of tired of the constant movie references and Matthew Lillard (who I like) drove me crazy at the end. If you’re not familiar with him you might remember him as:

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I guess that’s it – I liked it enough and David Arquette was actually decent considering the giant douche he can be. Hopefully these get less 90s as they progress.

Sporadic Chronicles of a Beginner Blogger Trivia #1: due to the way I grew a great deal taller before everyone else and my lean physique, my nick name in high school was “Shaggy”.

Sporadic Chronicles of a Beginner Blogger Trivia #2: Sadly, that was not my nickname because I shagged all the hot chicks around town.

Review: Scream 4 (2011)

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scream 4 poster

SYNOPSIS: Ten years have passed, and Sidney Prescott, who has put herself back together thanks in part to her writing, is visited by the Ghostface Killer. – via IMDB

And here we are, the final movie! Thank you all for sticking with me, reading, commenting, everything. As always, it’s appreciate it! It’s been a blast.

This one is definitely not right up there like the first two movies, but this is really not the worst movie to be added to a franchise, especially so long after the fact. It is infinitely better than the last one though, that’s for sure! I will always be a fan of the fact that the same cast has always returned for their roles, it just gives the whole experience a more cohesive and authentic feeling, which is awesome.

scream 4 ghostface door

Thank goodness Cox’s hair was sorted out – Scream 3 did her no wonders whatsoever, and whoever styled her hair with that fringe should have been shot. Seriously. Her and Dewey being together is adorable, and I will not lie, that blonde woman, Hicks, who was hitting on Dewey? She really made me angry :/ Stay away or go find an available man, hooker!

I am still not sold on Emma Roberts – even her face just looks like a spoiled brat to me, and she always comes across like that, too. Ugh. She isn’t even that great an actress (or I have yet to see her in anything where she wows me, at any rate). Giving her such a huge role in here peeved me a bit, but there were other things to enjoy. As I understand it, there was quite some backlash when Hayden Panettiere was cast for this (although much humble pie has been eaten since, by the sound of it). I thought she was great, and definitely a character I had a lot of fun with.

scream 4 trying to do ghostface

Sidney has the worst agent of all time and she annoyed the fuck out of me. Like can you even?! The woman had no morals or scruples! There were quite a few reprehensible characters for this one though, but you can deal with it. There was a strong focus on the teens again, very reminiscent of Scream, and I enjoyed exploring that avenue again, though modern kids are less entertaining than they think they are.

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Dewey with some power was awesome, and to see him getting hit on by the other cop and that pissing Gale off was classic, even though that woman irritated me (as I mentioned). Hicks did provide some classic entertainment for unleashing the snippy Gale Weathers we all know and love though.

Sidney is back in action of course, and the woman just keeps on getting crap flung at her. She has in no way had an easy life, and people seem so keen on constantly making her relive awful torment. This time around she is not taking anything, and puts up a great defense, terrified or not. She is making her stand and that is just that.

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I almost died when they tried to call Rory Culkin’s Charlie Walker this generation’s Billy Loomis. Are you freaking kidding me??????

My argument:

Billy Loomis – sexy

billy loomis scream corn syrup

Charlie Walker – not so much

charlie walker scream 4

The new and improved “rules” that were put forth in this movie and explored made me laugh, there were quite a few industry digs and they were handled quite well.

scream 4 i'm gay rule

For a sequel to a set of films so long after the fact, Scream 4 is highly successful and hits quite a few high points and misses in other places, but that isn’t an issue for the most part.

scream 4 don't fuck with the original

Overall I had an absolute blast going back to these films as well as watching this one, the only one I hadn’t seen. I can see myself watching the hell out of these movies again, so much fun to be had! Thank you all so much for undertaking this journey with me, taking the time to read and share comments, I always appreciate it!

Review: Scream 3 (2000)

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scream 3 poster

SYNOPSIS: While “Stab 3” is in production, somebody in a ghost mask starts to murder the new cast members. This lures Sidney out from hiding deep in the woods where she lives, and she comes to Hollywood to face the killer for the final act. – via IMDB

Alright, alright, this was certainly the weakest Scream film so far. It just didn’t do things as well as its predecessors, which is a pity. Not to say that it was a total waste, there is still fun to be had, but definitely not on the same level as before. There are flaws, there are contrivances, there is so much useless screaming and not such snappy conversation… what a pity.

Courteney Cox’s hairdresser completely screwed up her hair. I mean whoa. Gale is this hot, tenacious reporter with very few qualms, sassy as can be and pretty hardcore. Then she’s back here, and she is all those things but that fringe. Goodness. It was like a horror movie all on its own! It really didn’t suit her or her character whatsoever.

scream 3 gale hair

This one certainly lacked the charm of the previous two. I appreciated what was being done here, though I was not a big fan of everything being “the movies” and “on set”. It was gimmicky and didn’t work for very long at all.

scream 3

Neve Campbell returns as our reluctant heroine Sidney, and Scream 3 spends a little more time looking at her fractured psyche, as well as how she has locked herself away from the world, terrified and slowly dealing with things, but unwilling to be a part of the public eye anymore. Being dragged out because Ghostface is back was obviously inevitable, but the story really gets rolling when she steps in. I thoroughly enjoyed the throwbacks to seeing the set of Sidney’s home, the garage, etc. Those were nice little reminders, but some got overplayed and quickly. Our Randy Meeks got a little cameo, which was cool. We miss you Randy! But it also felt like it was squeezed in for those who raged about that terrible decision in the last film.

We have another cop here, which I am sure some ladies appreciated immensely. Patrick Dempsey plays Detective Mark Kincaid, the cop that is investigating the latest slew of murders, and who keeps Sidney at arms length while doing his job. I liked that not everybody pitied her out of hand, he was not for that. In his mind, she was a potential suspect, though he thaws later.

scream 3 detective mark horror movie

Something that I really miss? The “romance” of the phone calls has been lost, there are calls, but more often than not, like the last, it is more about slashing and killing than anything else.

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Then let’s talk about Parker Posey – I don’t like her. I never have, and I don’t think I ever will. I find her to be such an annoyance in all movies and she always comes across as whiney, no matter that she is playing the bitch/ruler/whatever. This was no exception – she never shut up, she was entitled, and I feel that she did more harm for the film than she did good.

scream 3 i'm the killer

As for the big killer reveal at the end, sheesh. That was a whole different kettle of fish to fry. I mean Cotton was being dragged in here (again), but he honestly didn’t last very long at all.

I cannot skip over mentioning Dewey in this post because we all know I am a huge fan. He provided some humour again, and watching him and Gale dance around each other after their history was something else entirely, but I felt that he was wasted here, and they make it look like Dewey can have no life or respect without Gale, which is kinda sad.

scream 3 it's your turn to scream

Scream 3 was also plagued by ridiculously silly and cheesy, predictable deaths, which was a little bit of a letdown. But when all is said and done, I have seen infinitely worse movies, this one still had some redeeming aspects and fits in with the trilogy nicely.

Review: Scream 2 (1997)

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scream 2 poster

SYNOPSIS: Two years after the first series of murders, a new psychopath dons the Ghostface costume and a new string of killings begins. – via IMDB

Sequels aren’t usually that good, we all know that. It is a topic that this sequel harps on about, and it is pretty successful. For one, I still had an absolute blast with this movie, how conscious it was of the type of film it was (once again), how it mocked and taunted (again), yet did all those things anyway. Scream 2 managed to pull it off, but I had no doubt that it would, and no, not just because I had seen it a million times before. Hell, it even had a (really) brief glimpse of Joshua Jackson in it, so there weren’t complaints for me. Personally, I would have liked to have seen more of that.

The opening is one of those that have stuck with people for years after all was said and done, whether you remember the rest of the movie or not, we all remember the brutal toilet stall slaying of Phil and the screaming theatre death of Maureen.

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I was so happy to see Dewey again, I think he is such an adorable idiot, and David Arquette was perfectly cast to play him. He is truly a favourite of mine, and watching him and Courteney Cox together was great, they just worked. Dewey’s fury with Gale and her book was a point of incredible entertainment for me, he was so childish about it all, yet still so infatuated with her.

scream 2 gale and deweyscream 2 deweydewey

There was no shock in the reveal (hopefully nobody was expecting there would be), and though there were more murders in this one, they were not as meticulously planned as the first one, and also much less phone calls. I miss the phone calls. They were something I truly enjoyed about Scream. I think one thing that really fell flat in this movie was Ghostface… not quite what I was hoping for, and it was a little bit jarring, too. It wasn’t as smooth as it could have been, though not a complete waste.

scream 2 gale stalked

The back and forth between the characters was as sharp, smart and fast as always, so nothing has really changed there. Sidney is still hanging in there, our reluctant heroine who is surrounded by wonderful people. I felt so sorry for Randy, perpetually stuck in the dreaded friendzone. Sidney is a wonderful character to carry the Scream franchise because she isn’t too much or too little, she never takes over and is never forgotten, and that is something that so many horrors can mess up. The main characters from this franchise all have their time to shine.

scream 2 randy

Gale kicks some serious ass. I love this woman. She is a shark and a super  mean bitch but she is hardcore, and she doesn’t take much crap from anyone. Sometimes she is just too harsh for some, and her lack of morals really is a bit rough at times, but she is someone that I really like.

scream 2 gale

Then something that happened in this movie that I am sure many fans are still horrified about. (Highlight text to view – SPOILER if you haven’t seen this yet). Killing Randy Meeks?! After all that we have been through with him, after all the lessons that he taught us! The only main character to be popped. Ugh. Why?! Craven, how did you think that was alright?! What the ever-loving hell was the meaning of that? 

 

I adored how Scream 2 starts up, and you are thinking they are going to do something different and you are missing all the characters you came to love, and slowly but surely they start creeping through the cracks. It really is something to witness them all coming together again to battle Ghostface, again, though it cannot possibly be the delicious Billy Loomis.

scream billy

Overall, Scream 2 is buckets of fun, while not as brilliant as its predecessor, it is a strong sequel with plenty of laughs, blood and gore – everything I am looking for in a film. Definitely worth the watch.

Review: Scream (1996)

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scream movie poster

SYNOPSIS: A group of teens are pitted against a masked murderer that tests their knowledge of horror movies. – via IMDB

Originally I had these lined up for a JB & The Chop collaboration, but extenuating circumstances meant that the outing would have to be cancelled. These have long been lined up for publication for the next few Fridays, and I was quite sad to see of Wes Craven’s passing on Sunday. What a pity, and the man gave us a lot of great horrors, slashers, and thrillers over the years. There would never be a more perfect time to line these up, and so they have become tribute posts.

Popping this in, as much as my other half was calling out how lame this was and how cheesy  and stupid, I have to admit that I had a total blast. Why? Not only because I grew up watching this, but as I got older, I could finally appreciate some specific aspects of these movies. When I was a kid, it was just about some weird mask and terrorizing teenagers and being different from other horror movies yet completely the same. I am older now, wiser. What this movie is, is actually a stroke of genius. Why? Because it mocks on horror movies, does its thing, conforms and teases and jokes.

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In a quick way, it is fresh. Different. Goodness knows it has been ripped off from here to Kingdom Come, and it has endured a lot of mockery and cheese on its own, but when you get right down to it, Scream still holds up well after all this time. In fact, it holds up brilliantly. I swear I damn near wore the VHS out when I was a kid, I watched this movie so many times, checked it out of the video store a ton more.

scream sidney

The opening scene for this movie is infamous. We all know it. Or, if you don’t, I am not quite sure where you have been. A creepy, weird phone call to Drew Barrymore? Check. A strange conversation that starts as funny and goes sour, quickly? Check. The popcorn on the stove that she is prepping for a movie that is our timer? Check. A superbly grisly death by the end of all the taunting and the crazy chase? Check.  Totally just one of those movies that was going to nail all the things I love in a film, and handles the delicate balance so well. This movie could have bombed, but it didn’t because there is a certain finesse behind it that just makes it all come together wonderfully.

Scream is so nineties, there is no way to get around that, but on the other hand, that just gives rise to all the nostalgia I feel when I watch that. Not because the nineties were anything to write home about or anything, but that was my decade, rugrat that I was and all.

scraem randy meeks bullshit reason

Scream is smarter than it is given credit for, and is constantly aware of what it is and how it is going about doing it. I find that awesome. It doesn’t get old, it doesn’t get boring, and it isn’t stale. It has an idea, and it runs with it, and is highly successful about it, too.

scream 1 bad movies

I was a big fan of the Freddy Krueger nod that was in here, as well as the way it was implemented. I had a pretty good laugh, especially seeing as it was Wes Craven in that outfit 🙂

scream fred

While looking for the above, I found this… LOL!

1-2-freddys-mopping-for-you

Anyway, I also really liked the casting. I mean, half these people you don’t see in movies anymore, though they were pretty popular in the nineties. They all did a good job with what they were given.

They made me laugh, they made me roll my eyes and cringe, but they also had me invested in what was going to happen and how things were going to play out.

scream rules

I feel for Skeet Ulrich – gosh, imagine getting a name like that as a kid and going through school?! I just couldn’t! Anyway, he was a cutie in a real fucked up, greasy sense, but it worked. Campbell was suited for the scared young girl with issues, David Arquette is a serious favourite of mine as the adorable Deputy Dewey, and Courteney Cox was perfect for the bitchy, sharky reporter. Seriously, like no qualms.

scream gale and kenny

The movie is quotable, too, and played off on a lot of movie clichés that had been seen a million times then, and have been seen a million more since. However, they all just seemed to be done so differently here, which is awesome.

I know he is doing only the most fucked up shit here, but he is damn fine while doing it :/ There’s something just slightly too erotic about the corn syrup licking and knife flicking…

billy loomis scream corn syrupskeet billy we all go a little mad sometimesbill scream knife hot

I know I am not alone in my sentiments. I think. I hope. I actually don’t even care. Yep bestie, me and the psychos again…

If you can’t tell from all the points above, I am a huge fan of Scream, it’s smart, it’s great fun and definitely worth watching! Thanks to Wes Craven for having given us something so awesome!