Review: Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

“We have to stop her here and now, and prevent Ragnarok, the end of everything! So I’m putting together a team.”
– Thor

SYNOPSIS: Thor is imprisoned on the other side of the universe and finds himself in a race against time to get back to Asgard to stop Ragnarok, the destruction of his homeworld and the end of Asgardian civilization, at the hands of an all-powerful new threat, the ruthless Hela. – via IMDB

Well, it’s no real secret that I haven’t enjoyed a single Thor movie so far. They aren’t terrible (who am I kidding, what was that Dark World kak?!), they are just… wasted potential. Seriously, all that lore and everything to work with and we got the two movies we did? Oh well. However, then Taika Waitit directed Team Thor, and I had a renewed interest. The man’s brand of humour appeals to me, and the short made me laugh. We all know I love his other work, so how would it go when he took over the reigns of a massive Marvel production?

In a word? Great. Really. Waititi breathed life into an Avenger that really needed it. Two, actually, because one cannot forget the Hulk in this one. Hemsworth is way more comfortable than ever before in his return as the Son of Odin, and he works so well with Mark Ruffalo, so easy and comfortable. Jeff Goldblum has an absolute ball as  Grandmaster, and Tom Hiddleston is, as always, supremely entertaining as Loki. Hemsworth and Hiddleston play together well, too, and continue to impress us with their hilariously dysfunctional relationship.

The humour is, as I was hoping, top notch. It’s hilarious, and there were a few scenes my husband and I laughed so hard at we went back to rewatch them a few times (Thor’s explanation of the dirty snake trick Loki played on him when they were eight and Loki and Thor with their “get help” skit are prime examples). It truly had me laughing. I have to admit, Korg (Waititi) had me in stitches a few times, what a character!

Thor: Ragnarok is more than just silly entertainment and solid humour though, and it must be noted that the movie looks great and has some solid effects, which I enjoyed a lot. The colours I truly loved, as it just fit the whole vibe of the movie. The soundtrack, too, works all the way through. This is not to say that the movie is without flaws. I, for once, could have done without the whole Doctor Strange bit, as I seriously felt it did not advance the narrative in any way, and was just there to fill time. I was also not a particular fan of Tessa Thompson in this, though eventually you warm up to her a little more.

All in all, I found Thor: Ragnarok to be a highly entertaining, funny film that just goes ahead and does what it wants, and it works so well. It doesn’t matter what you do/do not know about the MCU, you can still enjoy this regardless of.

Rapid Review: The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)

jurassic park the lost world poster“Okay, so there is another island of dinosaurs, no fences this time and you wanna send people in, very few people, on the ground? Right?”
– Dr Ian Malcolm

SYNOPSIS: With the apparent public discovery of the ‘Site B’ production island full of dinosaurs, John Hammond assembles a team to visit and document the area before it is exploited by others. Included in the four man team are Dr. Ian Malcolm and his girlfriend, Dr. Sarah Harding. When the team reaches the island, they soon discover the presence of another group of people. This new group however are not there for biological data but instead have something more sinister in mind. After a series of events, both groups become stranded when all their communication equipment is lost. It is then that the terror really begins as both groups scramble for their lives. – via IMDB

jurassic world t rex meets the city

GRADE 6.5Yes, I am aware I might catch some flak for this (but maybe not too much). Now, naturally when Jurassic Park is your predecessor, you have quite the big achievement to top. It is little wonder that, no matter how fun The Lost World is, it never hits the heights of the last one. Not that it is bad, it just cannot rival it. Anyway, to visit a new concept of an island with dinosaurs roaming freely was, of course, going to be a lot of fun. Pair that with the fact that you are bringing back the snarky Ian Malcolm, and you should have a winning recipe. You should, except that you threw in Julianne Moore’s Sarah Harding. A lot went downhill from there. What a bloody nuisance. There is no other way to look at her character at all. I mean, this is saying something because I really, really like Julianne Moore, but she worked on my nerves here. Goodness, she was silly and daft and just… no. Why?! Just, why?! A young Vince Vaughn was also entertaining, but despite all these things and a decent cast, things did not come together as well as one would hope. The movie feels like it never found its footing. Naturally a kid had to be dragged in here somewhere so that every kid in the world watching this had someone to identify with, which was great back in the day. However, now I am older and more grown up, and want to know exactly how the T-Rexes were convinced that they should just be patient, get baby, then strike back and toss them off the cliff? Not to mention (and I really, really need to know about this one) you have dinosaurs on Isla Sorna. They live there. They stay there. They won’t move. But you have flying species there, too, and no way to contain them on the island? How does this even make sense? It got a little out of  hand in places. Also, that ending felt very Man of Steel – it felt like it was over, setup for a new movie, but wait! There’s more! The T-Rex is taking the city! Oh well. Not the worst movie in the world but definitely not a highlight of Spielberg’s.

Rapid Review: Jurassic Park (1993)

jurassic park poster

“Yeah, yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could that they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
– Dr Ian Malcolm

SYNOPSIS: Huge advancements in scientific technology have enabled a mogul to create an island full of living dinosaurs. John Hammond has invited four individuals, along with his two grandchildren, to join him at Jurassic Park. But will everything go according to plan? A park employee attempts to steal dinosaur embryos, critical security systems are shut down and it now becomes a race for survival with dinosaurs roaming freely over the island. – via IMDB

jurassic park

GRADE 8.5Ah, the joy, the love, this movie! I know you are all fans. Why? Because Jurassic Park. Do I need to elaborate? This was the things that dreams were made of as a kid. A dinosaur park? Count me in! Even if the T-Rex was on a munch mission, I still wanted to see it then, and I would still like to see it now, though I honestly don’t think I will be getting out of any vehicle, anywhere, and I won’t be travelling in something that is anything short of a tank. Why? That T-Rex. And anything that big. Any meatosaurus. I am not sticking around for that for longer than needs be. The raptors were also scary as hell, definitely dinosaurs to be afraid of to the nth degree. They are just too damn smart. Anyway, Jurassic Park is a right adventure, even with the kids all over the show. I thoroughly enjoyed Sam Neill here, his Alan Grant was just way cool. Then, of course, there was the rockstar Ian Malcolm, portrayed b y Jeff Goldblum. My biggest question? Why in the world did his chest need to be on full display for so long?! Other than that, he provided plenty laughs. There was Samuel L Jackson and his totally strange “hold on to your butts” line, and Richard Attenborough was a crazy old coot with huge, elaborate ideas that he certainly did not think through properly. Laura Dern was a very good Ellie – she was smart and worked hard, though goodness she could hanker after having kids! Besides that painfully obvious “she must be a woman” moments, she was sassy and she knew what she was doing, super capable and I liked that. Also, the way the entire concept was laid out in the beginning was great – concise, fast, let’s you know what’s happening without inundating you with an overkill of information, and then you are good to go. The deliberate setup worked wonders, too, because you really get involved with discovering this amazing new world with the crew. Jurassic Park is just magical. There is so much work that went into it, and it is extremely obvious, and it comes together well. The movie also holds up wonderfully 22 years later. Steven Spielberg just understands how to realise adventure movies, and this was no exception. It was fun and it was intense, because the movie is set up in such a way that you never really know if anyone is safe. There is so much tension and doubt about everything, which keeps you on the edge of your seat, and the dinosaurs themselves look fantastic so you very easily get sucked in and see how quickly they can go from fascinating to terrifying. John Williams scored this wonderfully, too, and his music just rounded this out, as his scores always do. They always contribute to the films they are in – always so super memorable. Obviously I really loved this, everything about it was fantastic – the concept, the implementation, the dinosaurs, the terrifying situations, all of it gives us an immensely fun and enjoyable adventure film.

Digital Shortbread Sporadic Scene: Jurassic Park (1993) – That Is One Big Pile Of Shit

So, in this guest post fashion that has popped up on my blog recently, I am immensely pleased to welcome Tom of Digital Shortbread back with another Sporadic Scene pick. Thanks Tom!

If you have a scene that you would like featured, drop me a mail at sporadiczoe@hotmail.com with a picture/gif/video of the scene and an explanation as to why (should you want to include it).


Jeff Goldblum’s haircut: $400

Jurassic Park’s special/practical FX: $several million

Casting Jeff Goldblum (and his hair): Priceless.

There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s this one big pile of shit: