July Blind Spot Review: Oldboy (2003)

oldboy 2003 poster

“Your gravest mistake wasn’t failing to find the answer. You can’t find the right answer if you ask the wrong questions.”
– Woo-jin Lee

SYNOPSIS: After being kidnapped and imprisoned for 15 years, Oh Dae-Su is released, only to find that he must find his captor in 5 days. – via IMDB

olboy 2003 fight

GRADE 4Okay, unpopular opinion time, folks! I didn’t like this movie. At all. I know that it has a huge fan base and people love it and they have praised it from here to Kingdom Come, but I didn’t like it one little bit. I am surprised because, contrary to popular opinion, I actually liked the remake of this, so I was sure I was going to like the original. How sorely mistaken I was. I will have to rewatch the remake again sometime to compare the two films, but I definitely preferred the remake. Oldboy was an uncomfortable watch from the beginning, and I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the annoying score, I didn’t like the horrible camera work, I didn’t like the sick and awkward sex scene, I didn’t like that goddamn octopus scene in the manky restaurant… obviously this list can go on and on. I found so much of this film to be unsavoury and undignified, and I didn’t like one moment of it. I have no idea why this film has been lauded by so many. I had issues with the pacing, the tone, the way it was shot and how it looked, as well as what I am assuming was supposed to be humour laced throughout. Maybe this is because I don’t really understand most Asian cultures – this is true, for sure. Maybe it is because I am not interested in Asian cultures whatsoever, and never have been. I know that sounds terrible. Most of the world is fascinated by the East, but I am not at all, just doesn’t tickle my fancy. It’s not even the fact that this is a subtitled film that irritates me, because I love watching foreign movies, or subtitled films – especially when they are good. This was not, and I would not recommend it to anyone. Ever. I know, contrary to popular opinion, but I really disliked this movie, and will in no which way be looking into it again. Waste of my time, really. Ick.

Rapid Review: The Hot Chick (2002)

the hot chick poster

“You know what would be a shorter list? All the people that don’t hate Jessica.”
– Lulu

SYNOPSIS: Jessica Spencer, a somewhat mean spirited, popular and beautiful teenager, switches bodies with gas station robber Clive Maxtone one night and wakes up the next morning in his body. Freaked out, she must get her best friend April and two friends Lulu and Keecia to help her figure out what caused this. Along the her journey as a man, she discovers how mean she was and attempts to fix it while trying to get her boyfriend to believe its her. – via IMDB

I'd be pissed, too, if I woke up as Rob Schneider
I’d be pissed, too, if I woke up as Rob Schneider

GRADE 1Right-o, so I got roped into watching this the other night for a girls night once. This is totally not my cup of tea, but I figured I could go for something out of character and watch some ridiculous chick flicks. This was just way too out of character for me. I hate stupid humour, I do. I am certainly no fan of this. We can start with Rob Schneider. He truly irritates me beyond comprehension, plus I was submitted to watching a bunch of plastics instantaneously buy into this thing of an older dude housing a young girl, and all banding together (suddenly all grand friends) to help a girl who was most certainly a bitch to recover her body, or make do in life in this man’s. There were a few moments where things were tolerable, but overall, this is just so not my scene at all. I don’t know, I know I might be looking too closely at the plot (of which there is none) or at the acting (which was relatively dismal at the best of times) and all that, I know that it shouldn’t be taken too seriously, but this movie cannot even boast having a moral at the end of it all. I mean seriously?! Also, a big problem I had is that I do not enjoy stupid humour (as I have mentioned), and this was stuffed chock-full of it. This movie was pretty lame with a lot of ridiculous parts, humour that was just not on at the best of times, and Schneider as a lead? I knew it would be painful. Oh well, not something I will be going back to, and not something I can recommend, either. Skip it!