jb and the chop present star trek banner

Good morning,

Here I am again, writing the intro for this wretched thing. Well – I guess it’s not WRETCHED but it’s not any good. I think everyone was kind of getting too big for their britches after the success of the previous three movies and it showed here. I mean , Kirk climbing El Capitan bare handed??? Uhura nude??? Suddenly Spock has a brother??? GOD???? PUHLEASE. Much like I imagine the emissions that would come from Spock’s anus after he ate those beans McCoy made with whiskey, this one was basically a fart that lingered. Not my favorite. How did I end up with all of the odd ones, JB???? HUH??? HUH??? HUH????????? o_O

star trek the final frontier poster1

SYNOPSIS: When the newly-christened starship Enterprise’s shakedown cruise goes poorly, Captain Kirk and crew put it into Spacedock for repairs. But an urgent mission interrupts their Earth-bound shore leave. A renegade Vulcan named Sybok has taken three consuls hostage on the planet Nimbus III, an event which also attracts the attention of a Klingon captain who wants to make a name for himself. Sybok’s ragtag army captures the Enterprise and takes it on a journey to the center of the galaxy in search of the Supreme Being. – via IMDB

jb star trek

Well, whatever happened here I knew it wasn’t going to be great. I knew that this one was all about the “search for God” and all that, and that doesn’t even really faze me in the least, but this was just a mess. There were so many places that something great could have been done, but instead it wasn’t. What a damn loss this was! Completely and utterly, and this after the immense amounts of (stupid) fun that was The Voyage Home.

Here were something that had the potential to win me over on so many levels but didn’t:

the final frontier sybok nazgul

It should totally have been more like this:

the lord of the rings black riders nazgul

I mean whoop! But instead: dismount Sybok, and the damnation of the film is nigh. I suppose I might also just be having severe Lord of the Rings withdrawals… oh well…

Then, of course, there was the incredible epiphany I reached when looking too closely at the mount – another place that was just weird, and not in the good way:

final frontier sybok unicorn horse

Another thing, I just really, really didn’t like what was cracking with Spock in this one. It got grating and annoying and it got that way quickly. Also, I don’t know if I missed something with Scotty and Uhura, but luckily that doesn’t bug me too much.

What I did like, though, was the way that Scotty didn’t give a damn if they were meeting with God or not, or making history or not. He had one job, one passion: the Enterprise. His consistency is amazing.

Anyhow, The Final Frontier was just lame and bland and silly, and it really could have gone a whole other way. For example, if you look at what Bones did to his father, that scene had all the potential to have a much larger impact. Instead, nothing. There were funny bits, though, such as Sulu and Chekov vacationing and getting lost, faking a blizzard to Uhura. I mean really? Also, Spock’s desire for logic, and Bones’s desperate desire to see Spock just be normal.

I was a pretty big fan of Scotty busting Kirk, Spock, and a very grumpy Bones out of the brig. The morse code? The yelling? All of it worked rather well together.

Also, Kirk confessing the fact he would die alone and that coming up again later should have resonated far, far more than it did, and it just didn’t, unfortunately. Well, not much more to say on this, except that it dragged, then rushed, then just failed at the end of it all. Moving along!

PS: Chop! It’s not like I forced it or anything like that… it’s just… you got the short straw I suppose…

the chop

 

For today’s post, I thought I’d approach this a little differently….


PS: Today’s Star Trek post is a day early because, coming tomorrow, something special will be hosted over on The IPC and it requires centre stage and the spotlight! Keep your eyes peeled! 

36 thoughts on “JB & The Chop Do: Star Trek V – The Final Frontier (1989)

  1. movierob says:

    This WAS really horrendous, but I’m glad you both found a way to make it fun.

    Thought that usually u guys post on Friday, whats up with the change? 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Zoë says:

      🙂 Glad to hear that it is still enjoyable!

      Sherbet, I completely forgot to add in there WHY this went out today… something super special cracking on Eric’s blog tomorrow, we want it to have the spotlight!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. theipc says:

        WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

        #Exciting

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Zoë says:

        Naturally, it is going to be great!

        Liked by 1 person

      3. theipc says:

        I can’t wait!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. theipc says:

    Dearest JBSSB,

    Looks great!! Way to make the best out of this sorry situation 🙂 🙂

    Love,

    SC

    Like

    1. Zoë says:

      Dearest PSC,

      😀 😀 It was most enjoyable, again I thank you!

      Love,

      JB

      Liked by 1 person

      1. theipc says:

        Sweetest JB,

        It is crabby this morning.

        Love,

        PSC

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Zoë says:

        Dearest CSSC,

        What’s crackelacking???

        Love,

        JJB

        Liked by 1 person

      3. theipc says:

        Adored SSJB,

        Meh. It is just being a fussy baby. It will recover.

        Love,

        CSSC

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Zoë says:

        CSSC,

        It best be okay, otherwise It will worry.

        Love,

        JJB

        Liked by 1 person

      5. theipc says:

        SBJB,

        It’s all fucking work related. I HATE IT!

        Love,

        CPSC

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Zoë says:

        CSSC,

        Uh oh… that isn’t good. Reports?

        Love,

        JJB

        Liked by 1 person

      7. theipc says:

        JJSB,

        More fucking bullshit from my IDIOT management.

        Love,

        CPC

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Zoë says:

        Grumpy GSC,

        Not on man, not on.

        Love,

        JBSB

        Liked by 1 person

      9. theipc says:

        JBSB,

        Fucking sucks. 😦 😦

        Love,

        SC

        Like

  3. johnlink00 says:

    The rock climbing scene is even worse when you realize that Shatner directed this movie and is the one who made the decisions on how to shoot it. There is an absurd amount of ego in that scene.

    Like

    1. theipc says:

      No SHIT, man! RIDICULOUS!

      Like

    2. Zoë says:

      Oh my goodness, it really was terrible!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. markmc2012 says:

    I went to see it the week it came out. Too much dumb humor, hair metal Klingons were ridiculous, Spock’s half-brother was a bad idea from the start plus hokey special effects and a God trapped on a planet. There was enough crap in this film for three bad movies and I badly this film to be good.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. theipc says:

      Me too! Such an awful thing…. I HATE that it’s part of the Trek canon….

      Like

    2. Zoë says:

      This movie really isn’t loved! But you are right, there was just too much working against it!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. table9mutant says:

    But…. This is my favorite one!!!!! 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    1. theipc says:

      Are you pulling my leg????

      Like

      1. table9mutant says:

        Maybe. I’ve never seen it. 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Zoë says:

        PHEW!!!!!!!!! I thought you were going to give Eric a heart attack!

        Like

  6. It’s William Shatner’s love letter to himself! The plot could have been interesting if it was handled competently, but it was handled the opposite of that, so it’s a piece of shit.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. theipc says:

      #fistbump

      Like

  7. caragale says:

    This movie seems…baffling. Gosh there really IS a thing about the odd numbered films, huh?? Love the use of tweets in this, you crazy probies!!! God I’ve missed so much on WP and Twitter. Zoe, prepare yourself for a comment explosion on here this weekend!!!

    #probielove

    Liked by 2 people

    1. theipc says:

      Cara – yep!!!! And THANKS!!!

      JB, Cara exploded all over my blog last night – I can attest to this!!

      #probies4ever

      Liked by 2 people

      1. caragale says:

        It’s true. I imagine The IPC is still recovering. Miguel is still pissed at me for neglecting you for so long. I’m surprised he let me live for such a sin…

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Zoë says:

      This movie was so freaking stupid!

      I got all your other notifications hahaha, just hadn’t checked on Eric’s posts yet!

      Don’t worry, we take it in turns to assault each other’s blogs 😛

      Liked by 2 people

      1. caragale says:

        LOL. I’d never thought of it as an “assault,” but I guess it kind of is, huh? 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Zoë says:

        Hehehehe, passionate words and all that! Attack it with a ferocity scarcely seen and then let it recuperate for a week and do it again hahaha!

        Liked by 2 people

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